A Note to My Customers....

Asking for a discount will most definitely NOT get you a discount.
Telling me you need something right this second and then saying "thanks babe" as steam shoots out of my ears puts you close to near death. Just saying.

Asking how the greatest creator of creativeness is doing and bringing a big tin of gingersnaps? Well, that folks will get you everywhere. :)

I am so grateful this week of vacationing people is over. I attest, while I enjoy my alone time, manning an office by myself...STINKS!

Week in Rambles

Last weekend I succumbed to the holiday season and gently laid the jack-o-lantern to rest...in the garage of boxes that shall not be spoken of. (I will unpack them some decade...I promise.)

My MTV dragged all the tree gear out and we flung ornaments chaotically at children with fingers that were faster at hanging them then we were at hooking them.

It was a little bittersweet this year. As tradition my grandmother would buy all of her children and grandchildren Hallmark ornaments, wrap them as gifts and hand them out on Thanksgiving, as a way of bringing on the holiday season.

When I got a home of my own my mother gave me all of the ornaments my grandmother had given me and my tree was a family tradition from the first year.

I love that my grandmother not only gifted us these ornaments, but occasionally left little notes. One, a Santa with a nice/naughty list has her scripted handwriting in it with a tiny message, "Love you."

I want to carry the tradition on by giving my kids a Hallmark ornament every year for Christmas, it seems that Thanksgiving never works out. I love telling my kids which is which. I only ever get the chance to put one ornament on the tree, and do so every year and that's MY first Christmas ornament. (circa 1980). Love you Grandma, and thinking of you often.



On another note, my fur baby is in love with this artifical plastic glow toy. She knocks lights off, runs underneath, climbs up it, but really she can be so stinking cute...who could get mad at this!

I called this a week in rambles, so let me say, I've been in design purgatory! My goodness, but these people have been picky up in these parts! I did design something that will be projected on a huge screen behind a band on the Columbia Tower in Seattle, and really that is pretty darn awesome, if I don't say so myself. :)

The Week In Rambles....

I felt that I maybe have shunned this blog. Can I say, I feel that I am not quite parallel with my universe. That maybe I am tilted and trying to grasp at attaining some form of organization. Like grasping at straws, I quickly grab at one, only to find out that about 1,006 others have fallen at my feet. Unattended little straws, in a big chaotic heap.

My solution to this is to ignore them all! Hence this pile of straws is about to buuuuury me! I've got to get some focus. Sheeeeeesh!

Maybe if I share with you my week in review I won't feel out of the loop concerning my life.....maybe?

Let me start off with a cool beans item.



Scotch Fur Fighter

I have a fur baby. She is an orange short hair tabby. My couch is deep purple. I think this explains a lot.
Scotch Fur Fighter FTW! Seriously, by far the BEST fur removal tool. If I had a dog and cloth seats in my car I would totally have one for my vehicle also. One pad picks up quite a bit, and boy will you be horrified/elated/shocked when you use this to it's full potential! Totally a cool beans!




One of my new favorite websites. It's a virtual cork board! Make boards such as food, design, etc. You can peruse sites and "pin" them to your boards. Who needs a favorites list when you can access a visual cork board of ideas. View other cork boards and be inspired!




On another note, I've decided that I'm tired of intricate knitting patterns and that I will now be solely addicted to knitting afghan squares! I found an awesome blog A Year of Swatches by Lindsey Melvin.
Yes, I am knitting the 2011 squares, but she's planning on doing 2012 swatches as well. Make it a resolution to learn to knit! What I really enjoy is the beginner, intermediate, and advanced swatch for every month.  Here's my January 2011 beginner swatches. (they are nice to knit up when watching TV!)

This week I also managed to ignore the jack o' lantern decoration on my french table for the upteenth time. Which, also means that Christmas has not started in this house...

Cool Beans, or products I love, love, love.

I don't recommend most things. Why? Mostly I don't really pay attention long enough to realize how awesome things are. Let me tell you, I'm recommending these things straight up. They are cool beans!

iPhone 4:

Our contract was up on our phones, so my MTV and me on a whim went to the phone store and decided to price out some phones. I asked what he was getting...and he said, "I don't know about you, but I'm getting an iPhone". Well, then I am obviously going to get one too, because, heck we don't need competition over phones in these here parts. I love, love, love this phone. Being a key pad nazi, I was skeptical about the whole touch screen key pad, but it's AMAZING! I hardly use my computer at all! With my short attention span this works wonders to answer emails, look something up quick and play angry birds to my little heart is all warm and fuzzy! Best purchase (with the exception of my house) that I've made this year! Thanks Apple...I must remind myself that MAC will always be superior to PC. Sorry, that's a designer's point of view and it will never change.


Listerine Total Care:


Okay, so my mom says, "Disaster, do my teeth look whiter?" Hence I reply, "Actually, yes...yes they do!" She says, "I had a coupon for Listerine Total Care so I bought it, it claims to whiten teeth and after using it ONCE I noticed a difference". "REEEALLY?" I exclaim. "Oh, it tastes HORRIBLE though...much spitting and rinsing after use". Fast forward a week later and I am at the grocery store with my natives. We walk by the listerine and Goose Native quips, "MOM! Can we get gargle! I would really love gargle." (My natives refer to mouthwash as gargle, because, well you gargle with it). Staring me in the eye is the Total Care (purple bottle). 


Here is the down low: When rinsing it tastes like mouthwash, sorta foamy, but like burn the demons mouthwash. When you spit you realize it tastes like minty ass and you must douche your mouth out with water a few times...BUT! It is worth it! After one use, ONE USE, I noticed my teeth were whiter! *que angel chorus* Being a heavy coffee drinker this was like a minute white strip. This is my new favorite household product! Use it...or at least try it!

The Classiest Woman You Never Did Meet

Grandma's Nursing School Graduation photo

The last month has been the strangest blur. I've experienced fear, anxiety, excitement, hope, sadness, grief and relief.

My grandmother was one of the most classiest women you never met. If you were as fortunate as I was to have known her your entire life, then you already know that you were blessed.

This woman gave her all to everything important in her life. Family, friends, and her career. She was a fashionista, graceful, witty beyond measure, wise beyond her years, she took pride in everything she earned and loved. Her motto was, "Do your best, be yourself. That's all you can do."

I can hear her distinctly still telling me "Well honey, I think that's just wonderful!" This was applied to success, aspirations, a new look, a new time in my life...everything was wonderful.

She passed away September 25th, 2011 at the age of 79. She had suffered with Alzheimer's for close to 10 years. She always kept an upbeat personality. She actually would attempt to assist the nurses in the home she lived in...I guess being a nurse for 40+ years is a hard habit to break.

About 2 weeks before her passing I decided I needed to see her. I'm so grateful I did. She wasn't doing much, sleeping in and out, but she squeezed my hand and I kissed her on her forehead one last time.

Grandma, I love you. I'm so relieved you are at peace, but I'm so sad that I won't get to watch you wave goodbye from the porch until I'm out of site. I will miss your genuine interest in my life and the positive attitude you had toward everything that was dealt to you. Thank you for being the person I would really love to be some day and for striving to keep this family so close knit. You are one special soul. 

Tuesday, who could hang a name on you...

Tuesday and I, we have now established a bittersweet relationship. 


I was born on a Tuesday. In June. At 3:47 in the AM. 


This last Tuesday though, it was the worst Tuesday of my life.


Have you ever experienced the worst phone call ever? I can tell you I have. Twice. 


The thing about the worst phone call ever is, if you've had the worst phone call ever before, you know the millisecond you pick up the phone that the previous worst phone call ever has been trumped.


Your stomach sort of flops, then your heart bumps in your chest for about an eternity...then you hear confirmation of the fear you felt building in your innards.


Last Tuesday, I was working away at the accounts payable, it was 11:51. It's odd how you hone in on miniscule details when your world washes over you. I had actually been joking with my boss.


"Hello, this is Disaster, how may I help you?"


"Hey, Disaster" (I'm in full fear, amazing how acute your senses are).
"This is your father in law," (who is watching my children, so now I'm frozen with panic)
"Hi, what's going on?"
"Ya, well, MTV (my soulmate/husband/bff/partner in crime), he was rushed to the hospital, they think he might have had a heart attack or stroke."
"Are you serious?" 


Now, in my defense, here are some facts about my MTV:
He is young-ish. 34, to be exact.
He has the physical health of a 22 year old. (According to every single test he's ever had.)
I had just kissed him that morning. He was really in a fantastic mood, do people that are going to have strokes feel great prior? I'm so confused.


Well, he didn't have a stroke, he didn't have a heart attack per se....
His heart was racing at 191 bpm for over an hour. 


That is like running for your life. 
I'm almost positive his coworker saved his life.
They had to stop and restart his heart....twice.


If only I could relay the feeling of agony, regret, fear I felt. 
He was doing better, and I have no idea exactly what went on...(tests will have to determine that).
Only, I was slapped in the face with mortality on a Tuesday, and I pray to the stars I never take another human being for granted.


Especially my MTV.

The Golden $1 Coin

"What do you have there?" Gigi Pa asked Nunu as they sat in the go-mobile.

"A Golden Dollar Coin," says Nunu.

"Where didja find it?" asks Gigi Pa, with squinty eyes and a crooked smile.

"On the Grassy-grass over there," Nunu says pointing to some random patch of grassy-grass.

"Lemme see it." Gigi Pa reaches over with his leather tan wrinkled hand.

"NO!" Nunu clutches the golden treasure tight.

"I wouldn't take it from you! Just lemme see." Gigi Pa opens his hand.

"Fine," Nunu sighs and dumps his coin in Gigi Pa's palm.

"Why, I've never seen this kind of golden dollar!" says Gigi Pa, "I will trade you one dollar bill, for one golden dollar coin."

I lean close to Nunu's ear and say, "If I were you, I would trade it for ten dollar bills."

Gigi Pa says, "I'll give you FIVE dollar bills for it."

Nunu replies, "How about FIFTEEN?"

"No, how about ten?", replies Gigi Pa, his big crooked grin and squinty eyes even more crooked and squintier then before.

"Naaaaah," says Nunu, "I think I'll keep it!"

Gigi Pa roars, "BWAHAHA! I think you have a quite the negotiator there Disaster."

3 to the 1

Today is my BIRTHDAY! Ironically I thought of the blog I have not touched in what seems like ages...mostly because I remembered a birthday post last year. I declared I would be a "YES" person.


This has been an AMAHZING year...(yes with an H)!


This past week as I squeaked into 31 all I could think of was the wonderful people in my life. I know that it can be so hard to find common sparks. To feel love and loyalty with so many people from so many backgrounds is euphoric. I have been floating on a cloud for the last couple of days in gratitude of my mere existence. I feel like time is short so live, live, live. 


What I'm saying is...I'm happy. Happy to be a year older, a year wiser (?), and pray that I get to live another year with more experiences and sparks that will be burned into my memory for years to come.

You WANT to give me money?

So, after flailing my arms around and being supremely dramatic, my MTV and me have found somebody that would LOVE to give us money for a home of our very own.  Turns out that we are in grand shape to buy a house. Praise the Lord!


Now, pass the dough.

Word to your Mutha!

 Happy Earth Day fellow Earthlings! I celebrated the Mother Earth a tad early this year. We make it a point in our scouting tribe to do something of the service project sort 2-3 times a year at the least. This year we decided to put ourselves more in the community by participating in the County's Park Appreciation Day.


This service project was awe inspiring! To see everyone come together to make a park that is used by all spring beautiful was amazing. I have to admit that I hadn't ever visited this particular park and was excited to explore new ground. This park happens to have quite the doozy of blueberry bushes (trees?) and every year hundreds of people come to pick them.


I also found that not only do the parks organize this day, they also provide the dumpster, pruning tools, rakes, shovels and the like every third Saturday of the month! What better way to show the love for the parks you take your kids to then to help keep them in top shape for generations to come. I plan on visiting on third Saturdays to come...and maybe in late summer to pick my own blueberries.

What do you do to help your Earth Mother?

Evolution of the School Bus.... or another post with automobiles.

Today I was unfortunate enough to be running late and naturally that means I was stuck behind a school bus. Nothing says "GOOD MORNING!" like having a bunch of elementary kids give you pig nose faces from the back of a bus on a dreary Friday morning. So as I contemplated faces sticking in that snotty pig nose way, I also contemplated that buses look more and more like insects every decade...which also made me realize that I couldn't quite remember what the school bus I rode (as a snotty pig nosed kid) looked like.


Hence I give you the evolution of a school bus...in pictures!


WARNING: I am not educated on the history of school buses...therefore some of the photos might not actually be from THAT decade. I used google. Deal.

1900's Era: Great on a sunny day...in the winter? Not so much.

1910's Era: Not sure if I'm more fascinated with the bus or that Dorothy Gale actually went to school!

1920's Era Bus: Once again with those open windows. Can you feel the breeze?

1930's Era Bus: These gentlemen are inspecting the bus...or the driver? Have you been drinking sir?...oh and nice saddle pants.

1940's Era Bus: This is where designing buses to look like insects came in!

1950's Era Bus: I'm digging the STOP sign...and how the 50's tried to seem wholesome....

1960's Era Bus: This is something I could make a home in. Yay for pill shaped vehicles.

1970's Era Bus: Now, this is looking more like the scary death traps I used to ride in.

1980's Era Bus: Think leg warmers and Debbie Gibson.

1990's Era School Bus: It's a short bus...but you get the idea.

2011 School Bus: Check out the mirrors...now, you tell me...bug antennae? I think so.


I'm thinking the bus of the future should look perhaps, like this:

I'm just sayin'.

Possibly the best movie scenes of all time: TAKE ONE

The Karate Kid (1984 version) was on the other day. Naturally I had to drop every vital thing in my life at that moment and watch the entire thing...(like duuuh!) My husband and I both agreed that this was one of the best movie scenes of all time...



Oh, and here's a little factoid for you movie buffs. Did you know that Ralph Macchio (or however you spell it), a.k.a "Danielson" was actually 23 YEARS OLD when he played this character?! My goodness but he looks 14.

Scenes From A Car Rally

Here's the thing with car rally's...they are totally fun to go to on a lazy Sunday. You will also want to buy a car...and you will decide that whatever rally's car's you are seeing...they are now your favorite.

...and here's my favorite...

I could live by the river and sell jewelry by the roadside. 

Ginger is always sincere...

This song has been stuck in my head for minutes upon minutes upon days....




...which of course means that I have been thinking about the circus...Do you not have a "circus story"? For I am sure that everyone has a "circus story".

If you do not have a circus story, my only conclusion can be that you have never been to the circus.

Which means that you are only about 97.6% human or American. I haven't figured that out yet.

Either way my circus story is short, and rather stupid. I was 17...or 18. Honestly I smoked a lot of pot and really couldn't tell you date for date what went on between 97 and 99, but it was hella fun right?

My sister was turning 11 or 13 and my mom had told her and her tweener friends they could go to the circus. Not realizing that this meant living in hell for 3 hours she crafted up a devilish scheme...

"Dearest Disaster, my most wonderful child, most beautiful and oldest daughter....would you please take your younger sister and her friends to the circus. It would be the best birthday present a sister could give AND (the wicked AND) I will pay for you AND a friend."

...who could resist free circus tickets...I mean really?

My cool little hippie friend, me and three tweeners bopped on down to Barnum and Baily's...or was it Shriners ?
Do you know what listening to three almost teenagers sounds like during a circus? Like maybe banshees and wolverines plus...what animal chatters? Because there was some chattering to be had fo' sho. We made sure to keep them on a constant sugar high of cotton candy and ice cream. I also managed to spend almost all of my Target paycheck (I'm sure I can delve into that suck hole another time) on plastic jewelry and other assorted carny crap.

...and that was the day I became the best sister ever. *insert live angel chorus*
Op! This was a circus story not a story of heroism...I beg your pardon...

Directly after the circus I managed to hobble on my peg legs to my boyfriends house where I chugged a beer in 30 seconds, then preceeded to puke it up 45 seconds later.

For entertainment after the 2 min drunk/puke/hangover we put the clown nose on the blind cock-a-poo and shoved it in the couch crack upside down, because that's entertainment right there!

...and now, that is my circus story.

"I think it's perfectly clear we're in the wrong baaaaaaaand. Ginger is always sincere, just not to one maaaaaaaannnnnnn."

Chopped.

Would you like to hear the story of my christmas purse?


You don't?


pffffffft.


My blog. 


My story.


My flippity flip purse.


With a broken zipper.


Imagine Christmas morning. Oh the wonderment and joy.


My fashionable mother bought be a magnificent purse!


A very expensive magnificent purse! 


Exclamation point!


I fell madly in love with it. Oh, how I loved you purse.


Loved.


Until the zipper broke.


WTF. Expensive purse and the zipper broke.


Two months into usage? Please, for shame.


My fashionable mother remarked, "UGH! We are SOOOO taking that back!"


So, we made a soggy trip to the mall. It was raining. Like a monsoon.


Guess what? 


They took my purse back....and replaced it.....and because it was on sale, gave me the refund!


So... 


I went to the salon...
...and....


chopped off 9 inches of very long hair!


(I mean after all I really wasn't expecting that money!)


My head feels a lot lighter.


Thank you broken purse...for the second Christmas.


The end.

Quitter.

Well I made it a full week without smoking...
and then I went f r e a k i n g crazy.


I bought a pack.


I smoked it.


and I enjoyed every flippin' drag.


STOP!


This does NOT mean that I am quitting being a quitter. 


It merely means I relapsed.


...at this point I am trying to cut down. When I say cut down...I mean drastically...like a pack a week...and hopefully none at all.


I was doing great until tonight! What is with Friday anyways. Friday! Hang your head in devilish shame.


On a more positive note...I've started drinking green tea. Will this put me in the same group of people that order diet cokes with their big macs?


What is Agave Nectar anyways? I hear it is concentrated high fructose corn syrup.


Did you know that high fructose corn syrup tricks your body into thinking that it needs to store fat for the winter? True story...so I heard.


Stupid high fructose corn syrup! I shake my fist towards the heavens at you! How you mock me with your deliciousness! I have enough fat for the winter and ten winters from now. WHY DO YOU FORSAKE ME!?!


It's 2 in the am. I feel I maybe irrationally rambling. It's in my genes...jeans? ha.

Day of 3.

Back to the NON-smoking business. It has now been 36 hours...or a tad less. 

I think the back stabbing moment of my life in the last three days was when I had a friend stop by work and 

ask me if I would like to smoke...(unsuspecting of my resolution) and after bravely declining finding a 1/2 pack in my coat pocket. 

Well HOLY SMOKES how did that get there?!

The other knifer was when my husband (who is also trying to quit - yet had ONE cigarette today-I'm not judging but I'm feeling slightly cheated-is all I'm saying) asked where some random butt came from..(how funny does that sound?!?)

My thoughts: If you honestly think that I smoked today, what is the point of not smoking now?

Okay, really? 

LADY. GET. A. GRIP.

24 hours.

I have managed to make it 24 hours (PLUS) without smoking.

This is a magnificent feat.

I have to admit the first 23 hours were easy peasey.

That last hour.

It was KILLERRRRRRR.

Now to make it to 48 hours.

(and did you know that nicotine is as addictive as heroin?)

Think about that the next time you possibly try lecturing a smoker on quitting.

We never ask you to quit eating fast food. Or Starbucks, or whatever bad habits you've

accrued over your lifetime. Could you give those up? How hard would it be?